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So when I finally allowed myself to sexually enjoy and explore men of other races and cultures, I found these stereotypes blatantly untrue, just as several of the Black men that I had shared my body with didn’t live up to the Mandingo standard.

My first time with this White kid from Jersey was intense.

But he was persistent, followed up by Skyping me that evening re-extending his invitation. A few days later, he was headed to a nearby island and invited me to come along to explore.

I was looking to get away from the city, so I accepted, of course, booking my own hotel room, and arriving days late on my own schedule.

We spent the following days hanging out, walking the beach, but still keeping things platonic.

He had met and pursued a local Brasilian girl who was beyond sweet.

After listening to his tried pick up line in American-accented Portuguese, I cut him off and bluntly asked him in English where he was from.

Shocked, he laughed and said, “I totally thought you were Brasilian.” He wouldn’t be the first to make the assumption.

He broke the ice immediately and said, “She’s American.” And once again, I got the line, “We thought you were Brasilian!

I don’t know what color my husband will be, or what culture he’ll be from, but I will say this.

It’s amazing what I’ve learned in life when I’m open to more than one possibility. Have you ever tried sex with someone outside your race and found it went against popular stereotypes?

Eventually, our vacation ended and he headed to the south of Brasil to start his new job. It had been almost six months since we had first met, and I certainly had changed.

I returned to the city to continue living my life, and we kept in touch through semi-frequent Skype chats about our lives as Americans in Brasil. I had opened a different chapter in my dating life, one that included more interracial dating than relationships with Black men in Brasil.

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